after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
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they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
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I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
soo... how was my night?
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