dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
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