fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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