He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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