When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
He shit in the fireplace
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize