does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize