this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize