There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize