When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
