babies were throwing up all over the place
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
