he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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