Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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