Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Randomize