He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago