So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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