all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize