i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
