Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
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I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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