Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Randomize