its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
