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• (631): View more from New York

  He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on

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• (210): View more from Texas

  cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens

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• (406): View more from Montana

  I need a leather bustier to keep them in.

  (925): View more from California

  Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.

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• 

  Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.

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• (904): View more from Florida

  Champagne is a vitamin, right?

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?

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• (979): View more from Texas

  He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.

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• (928): View more from Arizona

  Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...

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• (315): View more from New York

  Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary

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• (206): View more from Washington

  he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Why does my car smell like burnt toast?

  (1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...

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• (989): View more from Michigan

  After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..

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