I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
