Is it normal to miss your booty call?
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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