I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
she pinky promised me she was 18
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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