Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Randomize
