eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Randomize