Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Randomize