2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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