He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
