But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
