then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Drunk is a universal language darling
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