When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize