im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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