This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
