I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
