Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
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