don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize