Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
