hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
i now understand why vodka
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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