you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
