Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Swine flu. Run for my life!
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.