she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize