All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
