I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
