Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize