Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
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