the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize