singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
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You took a bar mat shot.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
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He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
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