The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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