Whatcha textin bout Willis?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
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